It’s finally here. The day my glorious adventures in Perth end. :( It’s a sad and exciting day. Actually it’s mostly stressful, but what else is new in my life. I tried to ship a suitcase home and the suitcase itself was too big so they wouldn’t take it. So I had to split the contents into three separate boxes and ship them. Now I am praying that the airline doesn’t mind that I have two suitcases as long as they are a combined weight of only 20 kilos. They will definitely be more but oh well.
It really doesn’t feel like I should be leaving yet. I’m going to miss my time here but I’m not as sad about it yet as I thought I would be. That’s usually how I am though. I don’t really miss things a lot until I don’t have them anymore and then when I want them, I REALLLLY miss them. So it might not even hit until I’m back in America at home or even at OSU and want to do something that I always do here. Like get bubble tea. I’m going to miss that stuff. I don’t think anywhere in Ohio sells it. Trust me if they do, I’m tracking it down! Haha Well it’s a bittersweet goodbye. I’m happy because I get to finally go home (after my travels) but I will be leaving my fourth home. (I consider my house my first home, the restaurant my second, and OSU my third.) I like the laid-backness of Perth and I’m really going to miss that, especially at Ohio State, where it’s never laid back or even quiet for that matter.
It was really cute because my flatmates all know I’m leaving today. Well Quan Yuan, from China, wrote me a message and stuck it under my door. It said something along the lines of “Have a safe trip. It was great meeting you. – Quan Yuan p.s. welcome to China! :) “ It’s definitely the best thing I’ve collected here. I saved it and it’s going straight up unto my wall at home for sure. Actually speaking of China and flatmates. Well first I just want to say that my flatmates are great. They have been so friendly and I just don’t think I could have asked for better flatmates. They really have opened up my eyes to the Asian culture and it’s helped my development tremendously. I’ve come to realize that Asians are a really nice and their culture is so vastly different than ours. I was talking to Shintaro (from Japan) about how he’s my first Japanese friend. He then told me that I definitely need to make more Japanese friends and I promised him that I would work on it. It’s really something that I plan on doing, making more Asian friends. I think I’m honestly doing to miss all of the Asian culture I’m so used to seeing now.
I was thinking about it last night in bed, while I couldn’t sleep, about how different my outlook on life is now compared to what it was when I came. I feel like I’m a completely different person. One thing that has really changed is my opinion of myself. I might have already talked about this but it’s something I think is really important and something that is fairly new to me so I like thinking about it so I can retain it. But I’ve enlightened myself to the fact that I am my own best friend. Then I realized that everyone should be their own best friend. I mean I’ve known this but I believe that the only person you should ever worry about pleasing throughout your whole life is yourself. I mean you need other friends too obviously, but you don’t want friends that like you for someone you aren’t. You can’t fool yourself forever and it’s painful to keep trying. I like who I am and I hope that when I go back to Ohio State I keep this part of myself around, because I will be a lot happier if I do. I’ve also realized that being my best friend involved listening to myself. I need to listen to myself more often. I need to journal more or just sit and think more because I know a lot of the reason I can’t sleep at night is because my brain is finally thinking about all of those things I’ve been ignoring. So I just decided my new year’s resolution. I’m going to sit and think to myself, kinda like meditate, for at least 10 minutes everyday. Yup, that’s going to be it. Yay! I’m excited to start actually.
It’s weird to think that in exactly two weeks from today I will be on my way home. I’m super excited and I can’t wait to see all of my friends and family that I have been missing like a fat kid on a diet misses cake haha It’s painful. Before I came to Australia I thought that I would be able to live in another country, and even though I did for a couple of months, I realized that I wouldn’t be able to do it permanently. Of course it will be different if I’m married and have my own family, but right now my family is too important in my life for me to be able to live without them. It’s like part of me is missing. The fun part. Even though I have fun hanging out with friends and going out, my family just always make me happy. I would rather sit at home and play cards with my family than go out on some nights. Not allll nights. It’s hard to explain my though process and the only way I can explain it is like this: my heart refuses to smile in their absence. Even though I have fun and collect amazing experiences, I know everything would be even better if it were with my family. Especially trips like this. I mean at school and stuff its just school and partying but here, it’s almost like a vacation and I would much rather vacation with my family than any friends. Family is just more fun.
Well Molly and I are headed off to the airport in about 2 hours. My room is unfamiliar because of the bareness of it. I took my suitcases out and there is only really a couple of small bags left and a few cords. It makes me uneasy since it reminds me of the nervousness I felt when I first arrived and that’s how it looked. Well we are headed off to Cairns to experience the Great Barrier Reef. I will take lots of pictures!! I even have an underwater camera so this will be good! And then this Monday we are skipping over to New Zealand for our last week. Tuesday, December 1 at approximately 3 pm I will be boarding a plane to come back to Ohio. :) I will try and get internet for these next two weeks but I can’t promise I will get enough to blog. Actually just don’t count on it. I will definitely blog though when I get back in America. I don’t know how soon since I will probably be pretty tired in the beginning. I’m not planning on this being my last blog. I hope to have at least one more. Geia sou or goodbye to all of you though. I can’t wait to see all of you when I return! :D Love you all more than you know <3